Issue 9 Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum A Different View Of Keynsham July 2004
Bloke About Town - with William Bloke

'Beneath The Planet Of The Cars'
'Beneath The Planet Of The Cars'
William Bloke - click for biography WILLIAM BLOKE is Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum's resident 'Keynshamite' - never afraid to tell it like it is. This month he declares war on: 'Parents who drive their kids to school'.

What is this town coming to? The other day I happened to be near one of our numerous primary schools when the little cherubs were coming out at the end of a long hard day in the classroom. Nothing wrong with that, but the problem I encountered was finding somewhere safe to cross the road.

This wasn't because after all these years I am still in need of David Prowse, wearing a green & white leotard with Dynasty style shoulder pads, to hold my hand and help me across the road - it was because it seemed that Ashton Way Car Park had been moved, lock, stock, & barrell, to outside a primary school! Why is that? I'll tell you why - it's because too many parents are too damned lazy, or soft, to make poor little Kylie or Jason, Britney or Justin, walk to and from school.

For crying out loud, most people live within an easy walking distance of the school that their children attend; it shouldn't present you with too many problems. It wouldn't surprise me if most, if not all, of these lazy 'drive everywhere' parents didn't drive to their 'Slimmers World' meetings ("ooh look - I've lost half a pound this week"), drive to the gym, drive to the shops, to the pub or club, drive their angels to Brownies or Cubs - and then swear blind that they take regular exercise and lead a healthy lifestyle!

No you dont - you're too lazy to walk your children to school! Maybe your kids wouldn't be so full of energy when they got home if you'd make them walk 10 - 15 minutes to and from school! What is wrong with you? I bet half of you would drive into the school itself if it saved your precious little cherub the pure agony of having to walk 200 yards in the rain!!!
He's never there when we cross the road... He's never there when we cross the road...


I know some people will moan at what I'm saying. I've heard it all before - "It's too far to walk", "It makes my life easier to drive", "I haven't got time to walk to and from school" and the all-time classic "We would walk but it's far too dangerous as there's too many cars about". Duh! HELLO McFLY!!! It wouldn't be dangerous if lazy people like you didn't drive in the first place! Get out of bed 15 minutes earlier, organise you and your children's routine, leave earlier and take a healthy walk to school! It's not that difficult.

Neighbourhoods are not designed to take a huge influx of vehicles. Just look at the narrow roads that surround Castle County, Chandag Road, Kelston Road, St. Johns and Temple Street. Those who drive to the school are part of the inherent problem that they are trying to avoid. If you didn't drive to school there would be less cars outside the place so it would be safer to walk in the surrounding streets! I've even seen parents parked on zig-zags, double yellow lines, delivery access roads, pub car parks and even in 'residents only' parking areas in order to pick up their kids!

Do any of you actually stop to think how much you affect the people the lives of who live around the schools? What about the poor bloke who comes home early from work & can't park outside his own home? What about the person who has to get somewhere in a hurry & can't even get their car out of their drive or out of the end of their road?? You don't care about them as long as your life is easier...

Mrs Bloke and I managed to walk the little Blokes to and from school for a number of years. We walked through rain, sleet and sometimes snow, even though it was easier to drive the 1/4 mile journey. Walking is a healthy form of exercise - you should instil this into people from an early age, not pamper the little darlings, plus it wouldn't do you parents any harm either! Now leave your cars at home, stop being so damned arrogant, insular and lazy. Just get up off your asses and get out there and walk!!!

Next month... William Bloke endeavours to sort out the Bath Spa fiasco with a set of brass knuckles, several gallons of unleaded petrol and a box of Swan Vesta matches.
William Bloke


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