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Issue 2 Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum A Different View Of Keynsham November 2003
KEYNSHAM NEWS HEADLINES - NOVEMBER 2003
Like candy from a baby
MARKET RUMOURS PERSIST
Keynsham is still feeling the aftershocks from the decision to close the town's farmers market after less than a year in operation, amid unconfirmed reports that a thirteenth-hour rescue package may be on the horizon. READ FULL STORY
DODGY BALLS IN BLOW SHOCK!! 'That sucker's gonna blow'
A local businessman has this week announced ambitious plans to launch Keynsham's very own lottery prize draw - KLOTTO - with lucky townsfolk set to bathe in the glamour and excitement that comes with life-changing riches. FULL EXCLUSIVE STORY
STOP, LOOK AND LISTEN
Driving skills not pictured
You will have noticed over the last few months an abundance of alarmingly fast, ridiculously noisy, "full body racing kit"; super-loud stereo system-equipped motor cars and cheesy hair-drier-like scooters zooming around our sleepy town. FULL SHOCKING STORY
THE MOLEHILLS ARE MOUNTAINS 'Oooooh, me piles are playing up'
A Keynsham farmer has called for immediate government intervention following the mystery appearance of an over-sized mole on parts of his land situated on the southern outskirts of the sleepy Somerset town. READ MORE
END OF THE WORLD AS WE KNOW IT It's a dead end folks
A local clairvoyant has voiced predictions of a gloomy future for Keynsham and it's residents, following the unearthing of ancient literature warning of imminent apocalypse in one of the town's lesser-known roads. READ FULL STORY
'We searched the whole town - no chocolate found...'
IN THIS MONTH'S SUPER SECOND EDITION...
MUHAMMED SAEED AL-SAHAF denies all knowledge of chocolate-making facilites in the town, ANNA CACIA-COURT sounds off about pavement traffic, another voyeuristic Keynsham WEBCAM, more readers' LETTERS, a plethora of BRIEF NEWS, the WEATHER and a whole load MORE.
KEYNSHAM WEB CAM
Another exclusive Keynsham webcam, which we've located in that mysterious green box outside Somerfield. VIEW IT

THE MONTHLY MOAN
Anna Cacia-Court is back on the war-path, and this month it's the war-path that's coming under fire... READ MORE

AL-SAHAF IN KEYNSHAM
The former Iraqi Information Minister Muhammed Saeed al-Sahaf continues his oblique insight into Keynsham life. It seems he's now working in the Cadbury's P.R. dept. MORE

WEATHER FORECAST
What does the weather have in store for the Keynsham area in November? VIEW WEATHER

MERCHANDISE
Never mind the colour, feel the quality...
Presenting our exclusive range of Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum T-shirts. Coming soon to a High Street near you! BUY STUFF

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