Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum - Keynsham News Headlines - www.albertmills.co.uk/caneshum

LATEST ISSUE • COVER • NEWS • IN BRIEF • LETTERS • BACK ISSUES • CONTACT • ABOUT US

Issue 1

Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum

A Different View Of Keynsham

October 2003

KEYNSHAM NEWS HEADLINES - OCTOBER 2003

THIEVES ARE OPERATING IN THIS AREA Mystery surrounds the whereabouts of Keynsham's infamous clock tower following reports of strange noises in the High Street, amid fears that the oft-broken timepiece may have been taken hostage by a Bitton-based extremist organisation. FULL STORY

ECHO BRIDGE IS FALLING DOWN Recent seismic tests have revealed that the world-famous Echo Bridge™ in Keynsham's historic memorial park is in danger of complete collapse should we experience another 10-on-the-Richter-Scale earthquake. READ MORE	CAR PARK TO C.R.A.P PARK A recent Bath & North East Somerset Council press release has revealed that the 'Pay & Display' parking in Keynsham has been a huge success, generating enough revenue to continue with the next phase of the 'Car, Recreation and Amenities Plan'. READ MORE

BACK TO THE DARK AGES There is uproar this week as Keynsham is designated a European Darkspot for 2003, with the town set to plunge into spells of prolonged daytime darkness as clocks go back three hours this October - part of localised trials being conducted throughout BANES. MORE	DUCK, A LA CANE SHUM If you enjoy a steady stroll in the parks of Keynsham on a regular basis you may have noticed, aside from large amounts of cola cans and sticky used tissues, a large population of Mallard ducks which have procreated to great numbers over the last few years. MORE

ALSO IN THIS MONTH'S BUMPER FIRST EDITION... Muhammed Saeed al-Sahaf assesses the state of Keynsham's HIGH STREET shops, Anna Cacia-Court delivers her scathing MONTHLY MOAN, a hearty selection of READERS' LETTERS, some NEWS about crime rates falling and your chance to own a Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum T-SHIRT.

KEYNSHAM WEB CAM

See our up-to-the-second webcam which is currently situated on the Town Hall in the centre of town. VIEW IT

THE MONTHLY MOAN

Who, what or where is in the firing line this month? Is it Henry, the mild-mannered janitor? Could be... MORE

AL-SAHAF IN KEYNSHAM

Continuing (well, actually, commencing) our regular cartoon featuring outpourings from none other than the former Iraqi Information Minister Muhammed Saeed al-Sahaf as he travels the lands of Keynsham. MORE

WEATHER FORECAST

Check out the lastest Wet Office advance weather forecast for the Keynsham region.
VIEW WEATHER

MERCHANDISE

Never mind the colour, feel the quality...

Launching our exclusive range of Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum T-shirts. Don't be seen not dead in one. BUY STUFF

Legal Jargon • Merchandise • Links • Albert Mills