They're out there

No, I'm not talking about the town's traffic wardens. I'm talking about the wretched charity representatives that lurk near the zebra crossing, the one where Mountstevens used to be. This brigade of brightly-coloured-wasitcoast-clad vagabonds have been making the simple art of shopping a living nightmare these past few years. Not a week goes by without some organisation or another posting these clipboard-wielding scroungers onto our streets in search of fresh bank accounts to feed from.

Now don't get me wrong - I'm all for charity - I do a lot of work in that area myself, but there must be a less-public way of carrying out this extortion racket. If you are unlucky enough to be snared by one, you're likely to be subjected to a ten minute monologue along the lines of "Well the reason we're collecting is to save the housefly..." before being asked to reveal your confidential banking details in full view and earshot of the local crack addicts, cider punks and n'er-do-wells, who will be smoking/drinking/injecting away your hard-earned salary before you can say "Banana's Disco". Sure thing Mr Housefly-Saver, I'll just give you my credit card and bid you good day. Hope you save enough insects. Don't spend it all at once. Give some to the bums.

So I'm demanding that somebody does something about this ever-growing menace before the situation gets out of hand. If this blatant daylight robbery doesn't stop soon you may well start seeing smiley folks adorned with the wasitcoat/clipboard combo collecting on behalf of the 'Save The Charity Collector Fund', because they'll be an endangered species around these parts if they're not too careful. Mark my words, your time in the sun is nearly up. Anna Cacia-Court